Adulthood, what the heck is that?

Adulthood, what the heck is that? Today on the discovery channel we are discussing adulthood... This blog already sounds boring. (It might be actually but your going to read it anyway, sucker!), last month I had a revelation about being an adult. It came from the trusty source, The Muppet's movie. The mind blowing quote was, "Being an adult is becoming the person you want to be." Ok so maybe it is not mind blowing but it has changed my definition of an adult. So I asked myself who do I want to be? Well, someone who fights for Love, Truth, the downtrodden and outcast. Who walks with inner peace because he knows his Lord intimately. So how do I become this person... not by counting how many years I have terrorized this earth. No according to the Muppet's it is by talking practical steps to make sure I become that person. So whoever says now to, "act your age" that means absolutely nothing. You might be 60 but if you don't know who you want to be then you are no more an adult than a 3 year old. Interesting huh. So I asked the question how do I empower people to find out who they want to be. Well there is only one way I know, tell them their Identity in Jesus. If i say, "hey, you should define yourself by your job," then I am helping to create a workaholic who loves money and forgets about his family. Or if I say in, "your relationships with others," then when a break up happens the person decides to slip into the bottle. If I say define yourself through Jesus then they have built themselves on a fortress of love and surrender that will never fall. Ya life without Jesus SUCKS! In my view, only Jesus works. The hardest thing about being an adult is realizing the times when you have not acted like one. Because you have taken steps backwards in your progression to who you want to become. Then you have to man or woman up and ask forgiveness for acting like a fool. Life is sometimes so simple and yet so hard. Following Jesus is simple but He asks us to do some hard things. This is where I am at in my life I know the direction I am going and I know my motivating factor but putting the rubber to the road is not always so easy. It takes courage and a whack load of humility. These two things God has been working in me lately. Recently God has been saying to me "man up Marshall, be the man I want you to be, and stop being prideful of what you think you can do." God disciplines the ones he loves, amen?! It doesn't feel good but it is GOOD.   

      

God doesn't like me to be fake, so I have learned.

God doesn't like me to be fake, so I have learned. The post piggybacks off of my last one about safety. This past weekend I was at a youth conference in L.A. which was encouraging because most people were sick of safe Christianity. YAY I am not a total weirdo with weird ideas. That being said this conference was very safe, the worst thing that could of happened was not receiving any free stuff, so I thought at least. God in all his wisdom decided to call me out, saying "Marshall, would you really follow me if things got really hard, for instance if something happened to your child."... Hey God I thought this was supposed to be a yay conference where we all get encouraged, not the place that you put may faith to the test. Maybe God read my blog and thought, "Nice blog Marshall (I know all of you think this too) I wonder if you actually mean what you write? Maybe I should test him." Oh God have mercy on my soul. So for some apparent reason in the middle of a session God was role playing situations in my mind were my daughter (probably because a daughter seems more innocent and relies more on her father's protection) has been killed or was being killed. My type of fun if you ask me...NOT. As I was fighting back the tears in the middle of a class room filled with strangers I expressed my response of losing my daughter because of following Jesus. This is what I wrote. 

My daughter, my love.

A jewel of heaven,

A star of radiance.

Your light now removed 

This world less kind

How unfair

Unfair to have you.

To switch destinies 

Would be my joy.

Why am I to stay and you to go,

No one knows.

My self inadequate,

No power to save.

What a broken world.

What a broken dad.

What a beautiful daughter.

From beautiful God,

With beautiful God,

One empty world.

God knows how messy I am, how broken and vulnerable I am. I can't go back to worldly safety because in my heart I know that there is none. Only in the Son of the living God will I find my strength through the Spirit. Only God can make sense of this messy world.